Counting Down....

The first night of Hanukkah (my choice of spelling) is only 3 nights away. Christmas is only 1 week away. My shopping is not complete.

If you are standing in front of me in line at any store, please pay with a non-declinable credit card you can just swipe and go. Do not write a check this time of year, use an ATM debit card with pin, or try to count out exact change while you talk on your phone and ignore the screaming toddler clinging like velcro to your leg digging in your purse for cheerios.

Please bring all purchases, with your final decision made to the register. Do not wait until the sales person has completed ringing up your items to ponder if you should indeed purchase that lovely red sweater with the barking dogs that actually "sing" jingle bells when you squeeze their nose for your niece. It is stupid and she will hate it.

Please have all your coupons and discounts ready. Do not ask the cashier if she happens to "have an extra" back there, or start digging madly in your purse for one you damn well know you don't have. It is annoying to the sales staff, and to me, the person behind you. Besides, you are not fooling anybody.

Please make sure you have an easily accessible bar code on al items you are purchasing. If not, please be so kind as to bring a 2nd item with you so that a SKU number can be obtained without causing a 40 minute delay as Earl or Himatonyaloket (seriously, I had a kid by this name in my class) goes to find the price on said reindeer sweater. I mean, come on. You looked for a price on the damn thing before you picked it up to buy, right? Didn't you notice it didn't have one then? Does everyone that works a cash register have some kind of amazing brain power that instantly recalls all SKUs and prices? You adn I have all seen some of the geniuses working at Target and Walmart. We know this to not be true. It is the holidays, show some kindness to these people and make sure you give them the bar code, people.

This is all I ask of you. It makes life so much easier for the procrastinators such as myself, but for the poor souls that are forced to stand behind the register and deal with the masses of idiots that leave their shopping until the end of December. In the spirit of the season, please, be a considerate shopper... and get the hel out of my way!